Early this morning, I watched a half hour daily Christian show, where the popular speaker was touching on the topic of being led by God in our inner self, and then acting on what we ‘heard’. Every day leadings with actions we needed to take in response. The speaker illustrated her point with a very funny personal account of her arguing with God about something He wanted her to give away. Good sermon, I thought to myself.
Immediately after the show, I had to dash to the next town over from us, to attend a library book sale. Oh, I do enjoy those, indeed! It was a lovely day, and armed with the address of this library, I enjoyed the lovely Vermont day for the 20 minute drive. Arriving at nine, I discovered that the sale was to start at ten. What a blessing when the librarian took to me kindly and let me into the sale an hour early, all by myself!
After collecting a nice pile of children’s books, I headed for the historical book section, as my husband loves biographies and American History. They were quite low in price, and I nabbed a huge biography of Benjamin Franklin, and a lovely antique leather copy of Webster’s Dictionary. My husband would like these. For a few moments I thumbed through a very large book that caught my eye. It was all about famous Vermont thinkers and writers … interesting. But entirely too bulky, when we had a small apartment and not much book room left. So I left it, paid for my pile, and got into my car. Briefly the image of that book flashed into my mind again. No, I think not, I told myself. I needed to get out of the small parking lot before the book crowds came. Ignition on, and I very softly heard to go back in and buy the book. A wordless, but present suggestion. To big a book, I reasoned, and began the drive home. For the first half of the trip home I thought of that book. I knew it would be easy to turn around…but I kept going, For the latter half of the journey, I was telling myself that if we needed that book someday, I knew the title, and we could borrow it form our library. Or buy it.
About a city block from my street, I had a heavy and sad feeling in my heart. That feeling was actually a gift from God. I was not obeying Him. He wanted that book for us, and that was actually the very book I went to that sale to get. I was grieving the Holy Spirit. I stopped. Parked the car. I prayed, and asked the Lord to save that book, and forgive me for my reasonings, and for not listening. And I drove back to the library.
On that drive back, I realized that I had wasted a lot of time and some gas not obeying the Lord over a 50 cent book, and that I had just learned this very lesson on the television that very morning. Wow. I needed to obey that guiding of the Spirit of God within me, and not reason away what I knew was right. I also learned something else to pass along to whoso ever will want it – What the Lord teaches us through the written or taught word of the Bible, He will test us on sooner or later to see if we ‘got it’.
I am so glad I went back. The book was waiting for me. Thank you, God. He is so merciful and kind.
“And He said…”Be careful what you are hearing. The measure [of thought and study] you give to [the truth you hear] will be the measure [of virtue and knowledge] that comes back to you- and more [besides] will be given to you who hear.” Mark 4: 24 (Amp, Bible)